Cyberpunk Revival Contest Entry Working Title ModernPunks

[Kinslayer]

Have you seen ? The ruleset you propose sounds very similar to some of what Greywulf has there. There's no sense in repeating effort unnecessarily.

[tadk]

Checking that link out right now, thanks kindly sirrah

[tadk]

Link to the version up to this point

[Thought]

Very nice first draft. Querry: Is this open to feedback?

[tadk]

Hi Thought

Thanks for the nice compliment
Yes you can post good/bad/ugly/praise/suggestions to your hearts content

either on the thread or a PM to me which ever you are more comfortable with.

I did get more work done in the last 2 days, so that new version needs to go up also. Jotted some notes down as well to type in.

I have, in the course of making this, decided to use my Stripped20 (as I am tentatively calling my mod here) for 2 other settings I am working on simultaneously as well.

So I welcome comments in any stripe

[Thought]

Nice font for a retro-feel. It reminds me of old dot-matrix printers (that is, it looks techy, but in an old-techy sort of way).

Your end-of-the-world scenario seems to be kind of "fuzzy." There is a lot going on that doesn't really seem like it has a real explanation other than that it needs to happen for the story. For examples: "It gets a little less clear..." "In some fashion..." For what ever reasons..." "somewhere in the ensuing confusion, some enterprising person or persons..." "somewhere along the line as well global warming..." "But something triggered new dustbowls..."

I really like the setting that you get to, but the getting to that setting... my disbelief hasn't been suspended. Now, to be fair, I like information. I would want more information than you can reasonably fit into the document. So what might seem overly fuzzy to me might actually be just right. (if you are curious, this comment is inspired by the , which was designed for Sci-Fi writer workshops, but I think can be applied to a variety of uses)

On Pg 10 you list various elements that seem to be backed up with crunch and quickly follow that up with "the rest is all window dressing, history, gender, look, and feel of stuff" and you followed that up with "the rest is the meat and with the above elements the potatoes." Those two points seem to be in conflict with each other. Maybe this is a regional difference? But "window dressing" to my understanding generally means unimportant fluff, indicating that anything but the elements can be taken or left with ease. Then you say that these window dressing sort of things are the main course! Which is it?

This gets into design philosophy, but I tend to find that whatever the rules spend the time on is what they game considered important and thus directs play. A game with a lot of rules for physical combat and only a dusting of mention of other things will be about physical combat and players will behave accordingly. A game in which the background of characters are important needs to have crunch appropriately (either with light combat rules or crunch for backgrounds). You do this very nicely with your "backgrounds" being class-like, which I love. I am eager to see the completed section.

[tadk]

Hi Thought

Thank you for pointing out where I am unclear. It is honestly appreciated. Yeah I am waffling on some elements, and in the last week a few ideas and concepts gelled. Just got done with the latest draft. It does not address the issues you point out where I say it matters then it does not matter. NOTE TO SELF: Make Up Mind....

That said I plan to upload it and link it this weekend sometime, little bit more to it.

I think an experienced d20 GM could take it now and use it mechanically, filling in the blanks and spots I have either glossed over because I do not see it as pertinent, or because I am not doing the whole 350 pages of crunchy rules. It is still in the 90 plus pages range right now.

One thing I am trying to decide is, keep the hardware more modern feeling, i.e. real world names for firearms and computers, or like Autopistol, Revolver, Low End Laptop, High End Laptop with Solar Panels to recharge battery, etc. A design question I keep flip flopping over in my mind.

So I guess I want some more feedback, and to give it a few days to sit and stew. It is pretty generic right now, a bit more customization in the Abilities especially, is needed. But does it seem workable really, since I am planning to make this my house game system so to speak, so this is working kinks out as well.

Again thanks, will talk more laters.

[tadk]

Here is the draft as it stands

Still needs a ton more 'stuff' such as gear, and the what not

More background and more defined society and 'current' events to flesh it all out
Tighten up the abilities, add on more for Operators and Scavengers
Move the feel a bit more from d20 combat (which does dominate the system) to my more skills and individual advancement and explorative feeling

That and just customizing it more, removing DC and turning it all into TV, little things like that.


http://500pennydesign.tkimwrsvc.com/Mod ... s_V.75.pdf